вторник, юни 14, 2011

Still egoistically hateful...


In a matter of fact people are quite egoistic creatures. I am and I do not feel ashamed to share it with the world. That is why I do not judge another egoistic creature for the choices he/she makes. After all we search for the same thing: happiness. No matter the way we need to achieve it and overcome our current situation or ...

Surely, my inner voice interrupts me, but that doesn't means that you can't be hateful. You could always blame it on them. You can blame for your lack of determination, you can swear that you risked, you can just close yourself rethinking. Or else...

As I stay in front of my laptop which is basically my only real tangible friend I ask myself does it actually feel good to suffer from your own stupidity. I will repay my debt with some misery and hunger, hell, it will be hard and I know it... but after all it is deserved. I have decided to share something meaningful after all. I hate to be lied. Oh, in the name of all omnipresent force, I hate, hate,hate to be lied... 
And I hate to be misguided in any way. It provokes my thinking and analysing and that, my friends, is never a good thing. I cannot change this, but for me it is the worst type of lie. If you don't think something just don't say it. Do not repeat it like it is a f#$%ing mantra or something. That is why today I am egoistically hateful. It won't pass. I have tried to cry my eyes out. Nothing is helping in this case of self-destructing loathing except of my perfect plan to just hide away which I intend to do as soon as possible.

If I sound confusing it is from the lack of proper sleep. Sadly as I see it it is a future insomnia in developing... so I ask for double reading. It helps sometimes.

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